the significance of muffins

not a single soul in the world knows the importance of the muffin anymore. there are rules behind the muffin. rules that the generations have forgotten. the rules have been lost, until now. these rules are not fake. a muffin means a lot, put some time into the gift.

the first thing is the flavor. the flavor is everything. i recommend blueberry. mainly because no one can resist a blueberry muffin.

the next step is delivery. the muffin has many different meanings depending on how it has been presented. you don't want to give the receiver of the muffin the wrong idea.

• the friendship muffin 1: there are multiple ways to give this muffin to someone. you can tell the receiver before hand, so that they can be ready for the amazing gift. some people don't like the suspense of waiting, so this may not be the best way to give a muffin.
  

• the friendship muffin 2: to make the gift mean even more, but still fit into the "friend" category, you can make it a surprise. for it to be a real surprise, you have to look into it. you need to know if the receiver likes muffins. if they don't like muffins, that's hardly a surprise. if they do like muffins, and you give them a muffin, you will be friends for ever. no questions asked.

• the love muffin: this muffin can be given any way you want, but surprise is recomended. because with the surprise you can add the kiss. if you have a loved one, you don't need to make sure they like muffins, because any muffin from you will make their day. love is great. and easy.

• the "whatever" muffin: if you ask someone to buy you a muffin or vice versa, this is the "whatever" muffin. usually, you have given the money or received money for the muffin. so delivering/receiving usually means nothing in the ways of friendship or love.

muffins can also be given as an apology, a "get well soon" present, a birthday present, or a bar mitzvah thing. kids going into manhood love muffins. if i was jewish, i sure as hell would. you can give it to someone at a funeral, instead of some lame flowers. you can give anybody a muffin anywhere at anytime, and it will mean so much to them.

the muffin's meaning is instantly doubled when it is a "home-made" muffin. it means you put effort and time into the gift of a muffin.

sometimes you get that jerk that tells you that someone is going to give you a muffin, completely ruining the surprise. just try to forget what they said, because you want the gift of a muffin to mean everything. and you want to make the person who surprised you with a muffin happy.